It’s American Thanksgiving once again. If you watch any amount of TV from the states, you know that this holiday means a lot to our neighbours to the south. It’s that special day when they give thanks for the opportunity to stuff themselves with food until they almost burst, then prepare for the orgy of crass consumerism known as “Black Friday.”

Oh, America. You know I love you. I kid because I love.

For me, and the thousands of Canadians like me (as well as a lot of Americans too), American Thanksgiving means Football with an upper-case “F!”

Now, before I get to my picks, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention my favourite game from week 12: the Buccaneers at Detroit. In my column last weekend, I wrote:


I find it hard to trust the Lions anyway, but as divisional frontrunners, with so much at stake, they’re bound to screw up somehow. Winner: Buccaneers

So, did you watch the game? I did, and I loved every exquisite minute of it. I know that I said that the Lions would find a way to screw up, but I couldn’t have imagined it would be so epic. Matt Stafford threw 4 INTs (including a deadly pick-6 at the end of the first half), and the Lions also had a punt blocked and a weird fumble in the 4th quarter to basically hand the game to the Bucs. Tampa let them hang around, though, refusing to put them away, missing two field goals in the 4th, and allowing Detroit one last drive to tie or win it. And down the field went the Lions, moving into field goal range, but still hoping to keep the drive alive by converting a long 3rd down. So there’s Stafford, under pressure, backpedaling, throwing up a prayer (like he’s done so many times before) to the unstoppable Megatron… and… HE MAKES THE CATCH FOR THE FIRST DOWN!!!

Then he fumbles. The best receiver in the NFL fumbles.

Game over.

The Detroit Lions.

There’s probably not a team in the league I like to root against more. I’ve written about it many times before. Their head coach is dumb, and possibly mentally unbalanced (apparently I’m not the only one who has negative opinions of the guy). Their defensive coordinator is a jerk, and he presides over a collection of the most undisciplined players in the league. And, not to belabour the point (anyone who reads me regularly should know what I think), Ndamukong Suh is a legitimately dangerous individual who may very well have some sort of personality disorder.

The Detroit Lions. There’s no love. I’m not kidding.

Which brings us to:

Packers at Lions

It’s week 13, and the Detroit Lions are the very embodiment of that number; bad luck for themselves, and bad luck for any player who runs afoul of their idiotic defensive front four. Hell, they even have a player, Nate Burleson, who wears number 13. Here they are, with another chance to seize control over the NFC North, against a Green Bay team without Aaron Rodgers. I’m not worried about the Packers’ ability to move the ball on offence; Matt Flynn proved last week that he’s still a capable QB, and he’s back in a familiar system where he has had success in the past. Also, Green Bay’s wonderful rookie RB Eddie Lacy has had an impressive campaign thus far. I’m a bit more worried about Green Bay’s ability to stop the Lions’ offence, especially Calvin Johnson. On paper, this looks like a Detroit victory. I’m basing this pick a bit on hope and a bit on expectation. I hope that the Packers can hang around long enough to get Rodgers back, because it would be a shame to have the league’s best QB sitting at home during the playoffs. I expect the Lions to screw up. Is it too much to ask them to do it so epically three weeks in a row (I didn’t forget the Steelers’ fiasco)? Probably. Still… Winner: Packers

Raiders at Cowboys

I have much less to say about this game. The Cowboys, for all their struggles, are clearly the better team, are playing at home, and are in the thick of the NFC East race. Winner: Cowboys

Steelers at Ravens

Baltimore wins at home, loses on the road. That’s been the pattern. However, with a rivalry like Steelers/Ravens, you can toss that out the window. The Ravens’ offence is bad, particularly the running game. The Steelers, despite a bad start to the season, have turned themselves around and, though not elite, are competitive every week. Right now, Pittsburgh is the better team, and they should be able to grind out a victory to remain in the playoff picture. Winner: Steelers


Happy Thanksgiving to all of my American family, friends, and readers.

I remember one Sunday, several years ago watching the Tennessee Titans lose badly at home. I don’t remember the exact score, whether the game was of particular importance in the standings, or even the opponent. What I do recall is that with plenty of time still left on the clock, the colour commentator (who I won’t embarrass by naming because he’s not bad) suddenly announced something to the effect of, “And the Tennessee Titans’ faithful are streaming towards the exits,” as the camera panned the stands to show just what he had described. Faithful is a fancy word sports journalists often use in place of “fans;” considering the circumstances, it was ill-used.

That game came to mind again just this past Sunday, as I watched Tom Brady lead his Patriots down the field in dramatic fashion to a late comeback victory against the previously undefeated Saints in front of tens of thousands of empty seats. Brady had thrown an interception on the Pats’ previous series, and when the going got tough, the “fans” got going. As the ball settled into Kenbrell Thompkins’s  grasp for the winning score I remarked to my wife, “And those idiots who left will swear they were there for the whole thing,” at the same time as Troy Aikman said almost the same thing on the broadcast (No surprise that Aikman and I think alike; we’ve both had multiple concussions, neither of us can stand Joe Buck, and, combined, we have three Super Bowl rings.)

The people who attend professional sporting events are a curious lot. They wear garish clothes, hold up signs, paint their faces, cheer successes, boo the other team (or their own, if dissatisfied), and, ideally, participate in a communal experience.

Oh, and sometimes, they are stupid, classless morons.

Week 6 was not a great one for the NFL in terms of fan behaviour. Besides the baffling actions of the Saints/Pats attendees (“I mean, Brady’s good and all, but what has he done for us lately?”), we had a couple of highly publicized instances of idiotic behaviour by the paying customers. In Houston, struggling Texans’ QB Matt Schaub had to endure an injury, then he and his teammates had to listen as people in the stands cheered as Schaub lay on the field. Meanwhile, in San Francisco, as Arizona Cardinals’ DE Calais Campbell lay immobile on the field, fans did the wave (Apparently, the 49ers’ players were so embarrassed that some tried to urge the fans to stop, to no avail.).

At times like this, when those attending these games exhibit boorish behaviour, the media shifts to its default axiom that “fan is short for fanatic,” as if being passionate was any excuse for cretinous acts such as these. I prefer to think of the more descriptive “fandom.” It sounds like “fan dumb.”

Thursday Night

Seahawks at Cardinals

Calais Campbell is expected to play tonight, though I don’t know how effective he’ll be on short rest, and he’s a key part of the Cards’ better-than-average defence. I’m also concerned about hobbled Larry Fitzgerald playing opposite physical CB Richard Sherman. For some reason, the Seahawks have struggled on the road this season, and I expect that this game will be low-scoring and close, but I don’t like Carson Palmer against Seattle’s defence, especially with his propensity for turnovers. Winner: Seahawks

“(W)hen you start to count them out, they come roaring back.”

 “They look like a .500 team to me. Of course… that could mean that they start 4-8, win their last 4 games… win the division crown on the basis of the 10th tiebreaker, then run the table in the playoffs, thereby creating the most unlikely dynasty in sports history.”

 “(W)hen the season is on the line, (they) usually play like it.”

“That’s a lot of pressure for one team to handle. Sounds about right to me.”

“(They) made a huge statement last week… that being that they are still the champs, and that they can beat any team, any time.”

These are all things I’ve written the past two seasons about the same team, a team that has frustrated me perhaps more than any other when trying to divine the outcomes of their games.

Guessed it yet? No? Then here’s one more:

“A lot of people, myself included, have been waiting for the Giants to wake up and do that “Giants” thing they do, where they suddenly start playing like champs.”

My first season writing this column, picking Giants’ games was maddening; they’d play terribly, lose games I’d be sure they would win, then play a top team and kick their asses. In the playoffs that year, picked against them in the divisional round, NFC Championship, and Super Bowl. I needn’t remind anyone how that turned out (especially Pats’ fans).

Even after I picked the Eagles to win the NFC East last season, I still kept expecting the Giants to win. This season, even though they didn’t win last year, even though they didn’t look very good, even though they were rife with injuries, I still picked them to win their division.

I don’t know what else to call it, so I’ll just call it “The Coughlin Mystique.” I have complimented the man many times over the past two seasons, and I wrote in more detail last season about him. He’s a great motivator and a great coach.

So, even though I’m not a Giants’ fan, I find it a bit sad how low they have sunk. I’m afraid that in a sport where results matter, where memories of past glories are sometimes short, and where a no-nonsense coach wears out his welcome quickly when the wins are scarce, that this may be Coughlin’s last stand.

Which brings us to:

Thursday Night

Giants at Bears

Chicago has had some really bad luck with injuries on both sides of the ball, but especially on defence. In the past, this is one of those games where I would expect the Giants to make a stand, capitalize on a favoured team’s weakness, and pull out an unexpected a much-needed victory. In fact, I picked New York to beat the Eagles last week for these same reasons. I don’t believe in the mystique any more. Not with this team. They look like they’ve quit on Coughlin. It’s a shame. Winner: Bears

Thursday Night

Bills at Browns

Interesting contrast between the paths that EJ Manuel and Brian Hoyer took to their current places as starting QBs in tonight’s contest. Manuel, 23, a rookie first-round pick, won the Bills’ starting job almost by default when Kevin Kolb sustained a concussion in the preseason. Hoyer, who turns 28 next week, was not drafted, is in his 5th year as a pro, and has spent his career primarily holding a clipboard for both the great (Tom Brady) and the cover-your-eyes awful (every other starting QB in on the Cardinals last season). Oddly enough, Manuel has one more career start than Hoyer. Manuel has been brilliant, while leading his team to two victories (including a late comeback against Carolina), as well as erratic, as you would expect a rookie to be. Hoyer assumed the starting role for the Browns after Brandon Weeden was injured, and has played well in leading his team to two consecutive victories after starting 0-2. Both have given their respective teams’ fans hope that they have finally found offensive leaders who can turn their moribund franchises around. I’m certain there are plenty who would say that tonight’s game isn’t worth watching, but I see it as an intriguing matchup between two teams with potentially bright futures, especially if Manuel and Hoyer can live up to the hype and the hope.

This should be a close game. Both teams have plenty of talent on defence. The Browns are tough against the run, while the Bills have a disruptive pass rush. I like the Browns a bit more on offence right now; Hoyer has been steady, and he has a dangerous weapon at his disposal in TE Jordan Cameron, who has broken out with 30 catches and 5 TDs. Also, despite the fact that both teams are 2-2, Cleveland has been the more consistent. Even with the awful Weeden at QB, the Browns still managed to be competitive against Miami and Baltimore; with Hoyer, they put up 31 points against the Vikings then beat the favoured Bengals. The Bills lost to the Jets despite New York’s historically undisciplined performance (20 penalties for 168 yards), and barely beat the Ravens even though Joe Flacco threw FIVE interceptions. Add a stadium full of suddenly hopeful fans, and the scale tips decidedly in Cleveland’s favour. Winner: Browns

Geez, Jim Harbaugh sure has been quiet this week. A mouth full of humble pie will do that to a fella. As for me, I’ve enjoyed feasting on Harbaugh’s pain the past two weeks, and I’ll be damned if I’m not hungry again. Can the Rams help get me another helping?

Thursday Night
49ers at Rams

Easy pick, right? St. Louis is 1-2, with their only victory being a late comeback against the lowly Cardinals. San Francisco, on the other hand, is one of the top teams in the league, a legitimate Super Bowl contender.

Not so fast. This one’s far from easy.

The Rams have a few advantages that shouldn’t be overlooked. They are playing at home, and in a dome. The 49ers melted two weeks ago in Seattle’s noisy crucible, and don’t think for one sweet second that the folks in St. Louis don’t know this. Anything less than a superior effort at noisy distraction by the Rams’ faithful will be a disgrace. The Rams have some good young talent at receiver and a potential star TE in Jared Cook, which will help them to exploit the coverage weaknesses in San Fran’s secondary, as well as the loss of Aldon Smith’s QB pressure. Also, the Rams have K Greg “The Leg” Zuerlein’s big boot. Sure, they can’t run the ball very well, but against the ‘niners, why should they? Let QB Sam Bradford sling it, I say.

Meanwhile, San Fran is reeling. QB Colin Kaepernick has not played well the past two weeks, showing himself to be the inexperienced QB he is rather than the superstar everyone has made him out to be (too soon) as a physically gifted athlete in a gimmicky offence. Compounding Kaepernick’s woes are a thin WR corps and the fact that his most dangerous weapon, TE Vernon Davis, will either play hurt tonight or not at all. Also, the ‘niners might be without their most valuable defensive player tonight, LB Patrick Willis, who is nursing “a groin in-jur-y” (Thanks to the immortal Sam “Mayday” Malone for that one.).

Most experts are saying that the 49ers will come roaring back with a big win after two consecutive embarrassing losses. I think they feel the pressure of that expectation, and that they’re ripe for the picking. Winner: Rams

Thursday Night

Chiefs at Eagles

Expect Andy Reid to be welcomed back to Lincoln Financial Field in a manner that only sports fans in the City of Brotherly love can muster. And by “welcomed,” I mean showered by cascades of boos, thrown items, and profane, barely literate insults (for the rare Philadelphian capable of anything more than a grunt). Factor in the retirement of Donovan McNabb’s jersey tonight, and I’d bet that there’s not a pair of earplugs or an air freshener made that could make that environment tolerable to a civilized human.

 In the midst of all this, a football game will be played, an interesting clash of offensive philosophies. It’s been really fun to watch Michael Vick, Shady McCoy, and the rest in Chipmouse Kelly’s uptempo offence. The Chiefs have the personnel to run a more deliberate, ball-control offence; QB Alex Smith is accurate on shorter pass plays and takes care of the ball, and RB Jamaal Charles is a top-tier rusher. The key to this game is how the defences respond. After week one, I thought that the Eagles faded late due to the fast pace of their offence creating an imbalance in time of possession, but last week against the Chargers, Philly’s defence looked overmatched from the outset. KC has a better defence, and should be able to produce some stops against the Eagles. If the Chiefs are able to move the ball early on offence, the Eagles’ defenders will be completely gassed by the fourth quarter. Winner: Chiefs

So, the Jets, who I picked to earn the first pick in next year’s draft, picked up a victory in week one over a team I predicted would be much improved, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. New York achieved this feat in notable fashion, winning dramatically 18-17 via a late 48 yard field goal, in rookie QB Geno Smith’s first NFL start. These Jets might be better than I thought. They might be able to give the banged-up Patriots a game on Thursday night.

Whoa. Not so fast.

That the Jets even had the opportunity to attempt the winning 48 field goal was only due to the Bucs’ Lavonte David hitting Geno Smith out of bounds and incurring a 15-yard penalty. Tampa Bay played horribly, particularly QB Josh Freeman, and for the past couple of days, I’ve been reading stories coming out of Tampa that the Buccaneers are a team in turmoil. I don’t know how much is true, but most of the talk seems to centre on Freeman and Tampa Bay head coach Greg Schiano: the players don’t like Schiano; Freeman has been late for team functions; Freeman missed the team picture; the players voted for their team captains, and Freeman was not chosen, as he had been the past three seasons; Schiano has it in for Freeman; Schiano rigged the captaincy vote… and on and on.

Kind of makes the Jets’ win seem somewhat less impressive.

In my season preview, I wrote about the challenges facing New England on offence this season. Tonight, the Pats face a few extra ripples, as they will be without 100-yard rusher Shane Vereen, who had surgery on his injured hand, and will likely be without WR Danny Amendola as well. Still, New England should have enough healthy bodies on offence to get the job done. Meanwhile, the Pats’ defensive depth in the front seven will ensure that they have enough fresh players to handle the Jets on a short week. I’m hoping for a decisive Jets defeat. As anyone who reads me regularly knows, I can’t stand the Jets, and I especially despise Jets fans. Like the ones who would allow their child to behave like this in public.

People like this should be disappointed, often, and in the worst possible way.

Go Pats!