Or, as my friend Chad might say, “Who ya got?”

(And… that’s it. I had planned a much longer intro, but, life’s like that sometimes. Enjoy the games, folks. Should be a couple of doozies. –G)

AFC Championship

Patriots at Broncos

This is Peyton Manning’s year, the year where it all came together for him on offence. You could make a very strong case that he has never had this much depth at the receiver positions, but perhaps his single greatest asset was versatile back Knowshon Moreno, who rushed for over 1000 yards and 10 TDs, caught another 60 balls, and is a good blocker. With all the weapons at his disposal, Manning led a record-breaking attack. You don’t stop this Broncos offence. You have to limit its chances. This Patriots team has more depth and talent in its secondary than it has had in quite some time, including some ball-hawks who have shown a knack for making QBs and receivers pay for mistakes. This will prove invaluable, as the Pats need to focus on getting pressure on Manning and limiting Moreno. Another key to limiting the Broncos’ offensive effectiveness will be the Pats’ ability to move the ball, control the clock, score points, and keep Manning off the field. Much has been said about the emergence of LeGarrette Blount. He is ridiculously fast and agile for a 250-pound man, the perfect back making the most of a great opportunity, operating behind great blocking, in an offence run by an all-time great QB, and with plenty of depth behind him at the running back position. Not only are the Broncos not a good defensive team, but they don’t really excel in any particular area. This Pats’ offence should have little difficulty controlling the tempo of the game. In the end, it will come down to execution. I have to look at the players on both sides. This may not be Peyton Manning’s year after all. Winner: Patriots

NFC Championship

49ers at Seahawks

When I look at these two offences, I see a lot of similarities. Both feature strong line play, powerful running backs, and mobile QBs. The 49ers have an advantage in terms on their receiving corps; WRs Anquan Boldin and Michael Crabtree and TE Vernon Davis are better than anything that the Seahawks have at their disposal. At RB, I’d take Marshawn Lynch over Frank Gore. I also like Russell Wilson a bit better than Colin Kaepernick at QB, simply because I think Wilson is smarter and less likely to make mistakes. Everyone knows that these are two of the best defensive teams in football, so how do the defences match up against the offences they have to face? The Seahawks’ secondary may be the best in the NFL, a physical group that covers well. If Kaepernick doesn’t get the looks he likes on passing downs, he is quick to resort to running. Seattle’s secondary allows them to game plan for this eventuality, as well as to devote the necessary personnel to stopping Frank Gore. The key to San Fran’s defensive strategy has to be stopping Marshawn Lynch. Their strength at the defensive line and LB positions will help them tremendously, and will force Wilson to make more plays to keep the Seahawks’ offence moving. I believe that Wilson is up to the task, and that he will be helped by facing a 49ers secondary that does not cover well. Again, it’s about execution. In a close game, in the sonic crucible of CenturyLink Field, I’ll take Russell Wilson over Colin Kaepernick. Winner: Seahawks

Just a few quick observations before I head out to do my last night shift for a few weeks:

49ers at Panthers

Tough call here. San Fran barely won last week against a Packers defence that isn't very good and was missing some key players, and now they have to travel across the country to face the buzzsaw Panthers defence. I expect a low-scoring affair. The deciding factor will be which QB can do more with the limited opportunities they will have. I'm keeping the faith with Cam Newton. Winner: Panthers


Chargers at Broncos

If you're a Denver fan, and you say that this game doesn't scare the bejeesus out of you, you're lying. You should be scared. I'm expecting a shootout here. It won't be as easy for San Diego as it was last week, because unlike Andy Dalton, Peyton Manning is toilet-trained. Both offences are explosive, and neither defence is particularly great. (Aside: The Broncos briefly flirted with defensive mediocrity when dirty cheater Von Miller returned to the lineup after his too-short suspension for trying to circumvent the league's drug-testing procedure. Now, I would never applaud a player's injury, but it is fitting that Miller will not play. Don't worry Bronco nation; I'm sure he's currently taking some combination of caribou-antler extract, human growth hormone, and Adderall, with a twist of lemon, and will show up for training camp fully healed with an extra 10 pounds of muscle added for good measure.) I truly feel like this game could go either way. Screw it. I'm taking the spoiler. Winner: Chargers

Just a couple of quick picks while I deal with the aftermath of perhaps the worst migraine I have ever had (and I still have to work tonight):

Saturday

Saints at Seahawks

Whatever luck the Saints had was used up in last week’s escape from Philadelphia. I’m not saying that New Orleans couldn’t beat Seattle at home, but they’d need an awful lot of help from the Seahawks themselves, via mistakes and turnovers. Absent that, the Seahawks have the personnel to shut down Jimmy Graham and hound Drew Brees, and that’s really all they need. Winner: Seahawks

Colts at Patriots

This looks like a good game on paper. Alas, it’s not being played on paper; these Colts have to face the Pats in cold, windy, rainy Foxborough. New England’s deep and punishing rushing attack will be the difference here, while Aquib Talib, Devin McCourty, and the rest of the Pats’ secondary will severely limit Andrew Luck’s effectiveness. Odd aside: I actually had a dream earlier this week in which McCourty returned an interception for a TD. Sorry, gamblers; I didn’t catch the final score. Winner: Patriots

 

Hopefully I’ll have more on tomorrow’s games later.

In case you’ve been living under a rock (or, in the case of my home country, the “True North strong and free,” a snowbank), the NFL’s playoff seeding format is a mess, the wrong teams made the postseason, good teams have to play road games against bad teams, and the playoffs are going to suck, again, just like every year. Pity the poor San Francisco 49ers, winners of 12 games, being forced to test themselves in the sub-zero (yes, even sub-American-zero) temperatures of Lambeau against the 8 win (and one tie) Green Bay Packers. And as if that alone wasn’t enough to convince you of what a travesty this Wild Card round will be, the 11-win New Orleans Saints have to play their opening round game OUTSIDE FOR GOSH SAKES against a Philadelphia Eagles team that only managed to win 10 games this season! We can only hope that the Seattle Seahawks and Carolina Panthers, the deserving top two seeds in the NFC, make it to the conference championship game, or otherwise the regular season will have been rendered a pointless sham.

However, even though all of the attention is focused on the NFC, it’s the AFC where things are really wrong. So, in honour of all the people crying that the regular season should matter more and that changes have to be made when the end result isn’t what we want, I have taken the liberty of re-seeding the AFC so that an emphasis is placed on regular season results and so it’s fair. You’re welcome.

Since it’s Wild Card Weekend, let’s start with those wild cards, the Chiefs and the Chargers. Chiefs, you’re good. Chargers, we all know the only reason you’re in is because you got a bogus non-call (which the league admitted to) to win your week 17 game. Now, I was about to say that the league should retroactively take away that victory, but since the beneficiary team would be the Steelers, and the referee in question was Bill Leavy, I say retribution is a dish best served extremely cold, so suck it, Steelers. Chargers, you’re good too, and Mike Tomlin, use the extra time to learn the subtleties of not wandering on to the field while the players are, you know, playing.

The Denver Broncos earned the top seed based on their 13-3 record. Sorry, not good enough. I mean, it’s not really fair that the Broncos finish ahead of the Patriots, since the Pats beat them in Week 12. So, let’s swap them. Then, of course, there’s the matter of the Bengals. They beat the Pats, and they also beat AFC South champs the Colts, who also beat the Broncos. Regular season results should count, right? Congratulations, Cincy, you’re number one now. That leaves the Pats at two, Colts at three, and Broncs at four.

That’s much better, right?

I’ve read some pretty interesting takes on what’s wrong with the playoff seeding format this week. I’m not going to link to any of them; these guys get enough attention as it is, and I’m not giving them any more free advertising. My take, which I touched on last week: it is what it is. If you listened to the experts, the NFL would have a format completely based on won-lost records, or with the caveat thrown in that division winners automatically get a playoff berth, but then get seeded based on their record. So, the 49ers and Saints playing home games this weekend would be justice, but the 10-6 Cardinals making it over the 8-7-1 Packers would not? See, this is the thing that gets me about the media whining about playoff seeding EVERY YEAR; unless you can come up with a perfect solution, it’s probably better if you leave things as they are.

When I look at the Green Bay Packers, this year’s “problem,” I see a team that:

• Was 5-2 after Week 8
  
• Had Aaron Rodgers suffer a broken clavicle in a Week 9 loss against division-rival Chicago
• Went 2-4-1 over their next seven games without the best QB in the NFL
• Won a winner-take-all finale against the Bears with Rodgers playing for the first time since his injury
  

So, I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m not too broken up over Green Bay, and Rodgers, being in the playoffs, or even hosting a game. If you look at the Packers, they’re clearly better than their record.

Tinker with the playoff seeding format if you want. You’ll never make everyone happy. More importantly, the media will always find something to complain about. Don’t believe the hype.

Oh, and the playoffs are going to be awesome again. Just like every year.

Saturday

Chiefs at Colts

With LB Justin Houston expected to make his return, the Chiefs’ pass rush should be better than the one that Andrew Luck faced two weeks ago in KC. LB Tamba Hali will not play, however, which should make Houston easier to handle. The Colts defence seems to have returned to its early-season form as the secondary has gotten healthier. Since the Chiefs have no real big-play threat at receiver, this will make it easier for the Colts to focus on stopping Jamaal Charles. That should be the difference in what should be a competitive game. Winner: Colts

Saints at Eagles

It’s easy to say that I should pick the Eagles because the Saints are playing on the road, outside, in the cold. So that’s exactly what I’m saying; I’m picking the Eagles because the Saints are playing on the road, outside, in the cold. As long as Eagles’ QB NickFoleon Dynamite doesn’t experience an “Ohmygod I’m in the playoffs!”-Spaz Attack, Philly should be able to outpoint Drew Brees and company. Winner: Eagles

Sunday

Chargers at Bengals

Congratulations San Diego! Now, meet your destroyer. For me, this game comes down to the fact that, while both teams can score tons on offence, the Chargers’ defence is not very good, and the Bengals’ defence is. As long as Bengals’ QB Andy Dalton doesn’t experience an “Ohmygod I’m in the playoffs!”-Spaz Attack, Cincy should be fine. Winner: Bengals

49ers at Packers

This one’s easy, right? What, haven’t you heard? The 49ers are much better than the Packers. The 49ers own the Packers. The only thing that gives the Packers a chance is the cold. Seriously though, that 49ers defence is awfully good. In the bitter cold, that’s a huge advantage. Still, I’m going to act like the huge Rodgers fanboy that I am and pick the Green Bay. The Packers’ secondary just might be healthy enough to allow their defence to focus on taking care of business up front. Plus, we all know that, if the ‘niners’ defence does have a weakness, it’s in the secondary. Winner: Packers