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You've Got To Accentuate The Positive

1/16/2011

 
16-01-11  Depression is one of the worst things  that can happen. It effects you and everyone around you.  I know that I am starting to sound like one of those commercials, but I want you to know that everyone experiences this in one form or another.  Everyone.

Sometimes you feel overwhelmingly alone, like no one will ever understand anything that you are saying.  Other times, you feel like you are the only person who would ever make the stupid mistakes that you have made.  Then there are times when you feel like no one likes you (How could they? You are such a loser.).  You feel unsuccessful.  Friends and family seem to vanish, just confirming what you suspected in the first place; LOSER.  Well I have some news; at some point in everyone's life, they feel this way,

I recently had a conversation with someone about depression and the effects that it has on a person.  I don't need to watch a TV show to know the signs.  I know first hand.  My depression was that of a self-destructive behaviour.  I would do things that I really probably should never have done.  I would sleep.  Then I would sleep some more.  Then when I thought that I was ready I would sleep some more.  I was prescribed some anti-depressant, but to be honest, it depressed me more that I had to be on drugs to get out of this funk.  I thought that no one cared about me.  I was one who people would look at and talk about.  I am the failure? After all I control my own destiny, right? 

True.  You can control some things in your life, but not everything.  I can control how much food I eat.  I can control what time I wake up.  I can control how much TV I am going to watch.  I control my excerise regimen (which at present is nil).  I can control what time I go to bed/wake up/ get coffee.  You see, you do have control in your life. You just don't see this when you are depressed. 

Life is about balance.  Balancing the good, the bad, the ugly.  If I can control what time I am getting up, then I can control whether or not I am going to have  a good day or not.  The power of your brain is indescribable.  You can control your actions and how you are going to feel and react to others.  Use the Self-fulfilling prophesy to your advantage.  Set your day up the way you want it to be.   Wake up and say to yourself, "I am going to have a great day today."  Say it out loud.  By saying it out loud, you are not only expressing yourself, but you are also using your brain in several ways.  First, you think it.  Then you say it.  Then you hear it.  Then it is processed again through the brain.  One. Two. Three. Four. Right away, you have developed a positive pathway for your day.  A path to a good day.  Now, here's another key needed;  you need to follow through with this.  You need to be better than yourself.  After all, failure should not be an option.  You have to be able to stop yourself from taking the easy route and going down the pathway of least resistence.  When you are faced with something that will ruin your great day, look at it, and ask yourself, "Is this worth ruining my day for?"   Surprisingly enough, it probably is not.   Something I tell my daughter all the time is this:  I get her to ask herself (when she is facing some difficulties at school with other girls) "Should I really expend so much energy on this person who I don't even like?"  Also, I tell her that perhaps she should be using her energy towards something more important to her benefit.

Some caution I might add.  If you start off by saying that your day is going to be terrible, you have started your day down a negative trail which will be hard to veer from. Everything you see around you is going to prove that you are right and your day sucks.  It actually will put these things in prominance, highlighting the negative.

I am not one to say that medication does not help people, because clearly medicine has helped a great deal of people.  Modern medicine is quite the marvel, and there is a lot for which we should be thankful.  Depression is a serious condition.  If you think that you are suffering from depression, you should seek medical help.  At least they can give you some tools that will help. 

Now, on a more positive note:  I decided to write this to let people know that they are not alone.  One of my happys is when I get to help people.  I have never claimed to be anything super special, but I can listen, and I have been through a lot in my life.  I am attempting to use my life experience to open doorways and eyes of people who are like me in someways.  After all, at the core, we all have the same basic needs.

Happy Does It!

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    Author

    My name is Jaime, spelt with an "im" not "mi".  I have always loved writing.  I do not have much to say about myself.  I just want everyone to know that they are not alone.  There is nothing worse in life than feeling as if you are by yourself.

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