Trust. You need to earn this, right? You have to establish a bond between you and another person through trials. Yes, trials. Some are easy to accomplish, and others force you to question your own morality. It could be something small like a secret that you are sworn to protect, or it could be something big, like helping a friend in their desperate time or their weakest moment. Well, I've got your back. I am always there for you. I am one that you can tell anything to and I promise that I will always have your best interest at heart. I don’t need to hear all the bad things that happen in your life to know that you are in need of a friend. I can just listen.
How normal do you want to feel? Do you want me to tell you that I, like you, have a junk drawer that contains whatever I feel necessary to stuff in it? Also, I think that some of my behaviour could be classified as hoarding; those shows on TV scare me. How about those lazy days? You know the ones when you wake up and you literally feel like doing nothing, so you do just that, nothing. Perhaps you watch movies, go for a walk or even shopping to pass the time of your day of nothingness. I cannot keep up with all of my house work. If I could, I really wouldn’t have time for anything else. Here is another thing to make you feel alright about things that you do: I confess that sometimes I tell people that I am busy just so that I don’t have to go out and see them. It is not that I do not like them. It is more that I want time to be alone, and sometimes I feel like some people are like fine wine; I can enjoy their company once in awhile, but too much will make me drunk and stupid. Nobody needs to be around me when I am not at my peak. I am either cranky, or just bored. When I am bored, well, to be honest, I hear nothing that anyone says to me. I am not purposely ignoring them. I am just, well, me.
Through this wonderful universe we all want to feel normal. I want to feel normal. I am always trying to achieve something that is for me impossible. I have learned that I am not ‘normal’ and I will never achieve that state. But, even with this knowledge, I still yearn to feel normal. It is the lies that get instilled in our brains, those ones that tell you that you are supposed to be married, have children, and the live happily ever after. Now let’s see: I had a child young; I got married to a man who had a child ‘out of wedlock;’ oh wait, I can now live happily ever after. You know, it has taken a lot of me to attempt to accept that that is just the way that my life went. It is still difficult to see people who have their ‘normal’ lives. I have had to let go of the illusions of my perfect life. Quite frankly, it doesn’t and will never exist. That is one of the main reasons that I am doing this website. My life may not be the perfect ideal life, but it is mine, and how I choose to live in it is also mine.
My point today is, whenever you feel blue, down, or just blah, think this happy thought: You are not alone. We are all the same. There are innate characteristics that are in all of us. We are just human. So, if you are down, look to a friend, and see that they have your back. Like I have your back. Happiness is found in not only the way you live your life, but also by the way that you view the world around you. Hey, I even have a friend who clearly stated to me that he would "help me hide the body." Clearly he has my back.
Last week, a young girl here in Sackville took her own life. I feel sad when I think about how alone she must have felt. She was in grade eight. I did not know her. I feel that it is right to let others know that there are lonely people out there who feel absolutely helpless. This day, and so on, let your friends know that you are there for them. No one should ever be that alone. Ever. May her soul be the light that guides those in need of clarity, and her spirit be the truth.
Please remember that through tragedy comes greatness...
Happy Does It.
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